I Don't Want To Be Sad... Happy 67th Birthday, Mommy Zeny!

If you were here, I'd be asking you, what do you want for your birthday Ma? But you're not here... and I know that if you could tell me what you're wishing for today, you'd want to be with us. You never asked for more than that even when you were alive...

I don't want to be sad. I want to remember and celebrate your life with your progenies. Most of them were here and Jecko blew your birthday candle for you. Emman cooked our favorite Sweet and Sour Meatballs and Kendz cooked delicious Afritada and your favorite poison, Minatamis na Saging. Anna bought
JCo donuts which everyone gobbled up. You would've stolen one when I wasn't looking, if you were here.

I don't want to be sad. I want to remember you in the beautiful and handsome faces of my brothers and sisters.. and your grandchildren. They're all growing up and Olaf will be joining our family soon. Have you heard about Olaf? He won't know you, but we'll show him your pics and vids, don't worry.. he'll be handsome, just like the rest of the boys. You passed on really good genes, Ma.

I don't want to be sad. I feel your presence and your absence at the same time. I want to think of you and be at peace for once. I want to be happy that you're resting now or whatever it is you're doing out there. 

I don't want to be sad... even though I want you here blowing your cake and celebrating another year with us. When I think about how it would've been if you lived through that last episode, I know you wouldn't be happy. Dialysis every other day... no, you would've hated that. You've mentioned it enough.

So, just for today Ma, I won't be sad. I will be happy that you left this life not defeated by diabetes. You left it before it can defeat you. I'm thankful for that and it's something to be happy about. You had both your legs and you didn't have to spend the rest of your life on a dialysis machine. You didn't have to suffer more. I'm thankful for that Ma. I would have died if I saw you suffering and losing your spirit.

So, here's to your unbroken spirit and your victory Mama! 

I wish I could have had more time to give you what you deserve, 

but I am forever grateful that we had the time that we had.

Happy Happy Birthday! We love you so much!